I'm tired! I'm back to a "routine" of sorts but I think we are still trying to get things sorted and organized around here. I'm also tired of dealing with the above title! I know I'll constantly be battling something with the children, but ever since we got back from Halkirk Amelia has acted up something fierce. Tantrums of some sort of which no discipline but perhaps put her in another room works. Then I have Mr. Aaron starting to say "No" at everything...well, especially when we want him to do something and well, we just can't have that I also have it on a video clip! And the last one is of course a general term for the first two and all the bits and bobs between. Owen is still very sweet though, so I can't complain! :) I just need encouragment and strength to continue on through the day.
These are from our trip in Canada. This was a BBQ at Uncle Dave and Aunt Heathers (after the wedding).
The week after the wedding was spent visiting with Joe and Care (and my lovely nieces!!)
Doesn't Julia look so sweet here? I can't wait for her to have a baby brother!! :)
More sweeties!
More sweeties :D
Abigail and Owen
Amelia saw the other Smith children drying dishes sooo she took an interest in it too :)
Taken in Halkirk Daddy and his 2nd son.
Till another time...
6 comments:
Rebecca is purposely disregarding anything that we (obviously) want her to do as well... and I really don't have a clue how to discipline a baby, except just keep telling her (and moving her if needed) over and over. I have had her do things I never thought a ten month old would even be able to do! She likes to open our back door and leave the house on her own, and I'm really not sure how to get her to stop! We swat or pinch her hand for touching items she's not to be touching, especially if it is something that could harm her, and if I ask that she come and she doesn't (or she goes the other way) I go and get her and bring her to where I wanted her in the first place, but I really haven't got this figured out at all yet! Funny thing being... she'll listen to what we tell her, she obviously knows what we want, because she'll grin, and go do the opposite... but, she squeals "YEEEAAAH!" first, which is funny, because you would think she'd be saying the other word instead...
Anyway... I'm not overly encouraging right now, probably because I feel a little discouraged at the moment Re: obedience training as well, but eventually I'm sure it will happen, and we'll both have wonderfully behaved little people... eventually! :-)
Hello Evelyn! It's so good to hear about what's going on with you, Jett, and the kids. And good to see the pictures! Are y'all in Perth for this whole year? Is Jett taking services there?
I'm sorry to hear that about Amy. Have y'all established whether it's the medicine or not? I hope she becomes more manageable. Is Aaron really refusing to obey, or is he just saying "no"?
Anyway, greetings from Texas.
Melissa I'm sorry about Rebecca disobeying etc. I'm battling something fierce with Amy at the moment, any ideas on how to deal with tantrums?
Sam, yes we're staying in Perth for the winter, and yes Jett is taking services here, although just this weekend he went to Larne and will be going in another couple of weeks again.
I'm not positive that Amy's badness is caused by the medicine but I will be looking into it.
And Aaron does both, he likes to say "no" if he as an audience (that will laugh or try not to laugh...) but he also does say it and mean it.
I know a lot of times tantrums come from excessive tiredness or hunger. Most times, I try to figure out what is causing the problem. Rebecca is a pretty happy baby, and rarely throws a fit unless she is tired or hungry... both of which are easily fixed!
However, I've found that with nearly any child who isn't having one of those two issues, ignoring the tantrum generally works, because they're usually looking for attention in the *wrong* way.
Assuming it is not Amelia's medication causing the problem, and it's simply a temper tantrum because she doesn't like what's going on (probably just simply wants attention at an inappropriate time), the suggestion given by one of my favourite parenting book authors (Dr. Kevin Leman) is this (directly quoted from his book):
He says, "When your child is throwing a tantrum, what's the purposive behavior? To get attention. To exert authority over you. And if throwing tantrums has worked in the past, your child will continue to throw them in the future... My favorite suggestion to deal with tantrums is to step over the child (reigning in the temptation to step on him/her), totally ignore the behavior, and move on with whatever else you were doing. If it happens in the mall, just ignore her and move on ahead. And without an audience there, there's really no need for the temper tantrum to continue.... You'll change the behavior guaranteed, by using my tried-and-true method:
1. Say it once.
2. Turn your back.
3. Walk away."
He says consistency in using the method is the key. He says that if the situation requires a statement, then don't say anything further after you've "said it once". And then, don't look at the child or go back to them once you have turned your back and/or walked away. He says that generally, because it is an attention getting tactic, the child's tantrum will stop as soon as you are no longer in the vicinity. He states at the end that after a tantrum is over, the child must give an honest, REAL apology for their misbehaviour before live may move on and the issue may be considered dealt with... for that time. :-)
Interestingly enough... his suggestion is exactly what mine is, LOL. No, I didn't memorize his books! It's just what has worked for me with any child having a tantrum so far! :)
Oh, and I've found that "hand-over-hand" works nicely for a very young child who refuses to do what they are told at the age Aaron is (I use this on Rebecca as well). If you say "pick up the blocks" or "come here" or whatever, and the child refuses, verbally, or non-verbally, then taking their hand and making them do it, and saying a firm "yes", or in the case of refusing to come, pick them up and place them where they were to come with that firm "yes" will eventually make a difference. Of course, it's rather involved, and it requires consistently doing it until the child just does what they're told, but it makes the point. Rebecca thinks it's funny though. *sigh*
Thank you Melissa, will be talking to Jett about what we should do about this and I keep leaning this way myself as other things have not worked!
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